How To Squash All DJ Twitter Beefs

Here are some ideas on how we could squash some DJ Twitter fights, put them in the ring.
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David Ireland
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Here are some ideas on how we could squash some DJ Twitter fights, put them in the ring.
How To Squash All DJ Twitter Beefs

Sort Out Your Beefs In The Ring?

It's a curious thing, these Twitter beefs and shit talking sessions that have become an epidemic among electronic music fans, DJs, and producers. The general public feeds on them like hoodrats watching a street fight, social media gladiators going at each other for the title of "King Troll."

The reigning champ might be @deadmau5, but I haven't really taken the time to study any metrics, it's just a hunch.

I guess my point is that the tinted glass of the internet has made all shit talkers, and hyper opinionated assholes feel safe when spewing their 140 characters into the feed. I'm starting to think that we actually might be losing IQ points the longer we watch it, almost like the "snowcrash" virus in the Neal Stephenson novel. Once you are infected, it's terminal for your intellect, and you come out sounding like honey boo boo on the other side (and no I'm not capitalizing honey boo boo).

Before social media, this type of venom was mainly kept private or limited to shit talking amongst your clique. You certainly weren't walking up to people and just throwing your opinion in their face, that just wouldn't be socially acceptable in any situation so why do people feel like they can do it on Twitter? My guess, they feel safer about letting those opinions rip behind their @handle that often is anonymous.

So how do we solve all these DJ Twitter beefs? I'm only going to offer up a hypothetical here because we are never going to solve them, only the DJs and Trolls can slow that roll.

Here are the two ways that I think would settle things down a bit. The first would be to settle it in the ring, put the gloves on and go ten rounds with your nemesis. This type of accountability would change everything, if you felt inclined to throw down some insults then put your gloves on and settle it like gentlemen. This solution would only be for the most serious offenders, the venomous insult spitters who troll for pleasure.

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For those insulters who are larger physically than their targets, you would just be labeled a bully and ye would get the old tar and feather treatment.

Most of these Twitter twits fall under the textbook definition of "immature" and would most likely go quiet if they actually had to act like adults. They used to duel with pistols for dispensing such insults, think about that for a minute.

No violence doesn't solve anything, I'm just using this extreme example to make a point. So settle down, you'll like the next idea better.

For the lesser offenders, the misdemeanors if you will, we could have a public debate. Stand in front of a podium and argue your points like a civilized human in front of an audience of your peers. You could even do this online, create a new platform like Google hangouts that has a mediator and allows everyone to watch and comment on how things are going. The winner is decided by popular vote and judged by the audience on their ability to argue their case.

We are probably never going to stop it completely as it's unfortunately become a part of the social media norm. You never know, with enough troll shaming we might be able to slow it down like we did smoking.

I will close with this great quote, "opinions are like assholes, everyone has one," but just because you have one doesn't mean that everyone needs to hear it. Just pretend you are at a dinner party, how would you behave in that setting? Would you go up to complete strangers and just start spewing your opinion out in quick bursts? Probably not.